Funny Nurse Quotes

Working in nursing is an incredibly rewarding career. But, that doesn’t take away the fact that some days just stink — literally. To help you get through the highs and lows of your day, we’ve created a list of hilarious nursing quotes to make you smile.

20 Funny Quotes for Nurses

1. You know you’re a nurse when your finger has gone places you never thought possible. — Unknown

2. Don’t mess with me — I get paid to poke people with sharp objects. — Unknown

3. Nursing friendships are a different kind of love. Like, ‘I’ll hold the butt cheeks while you clean the butt crack’ kind of love! — Unknown

4. They can put up with me, so you know that’s a good company. — Olivia Mason, Sonas LPN

5. Nurse — the first person you see after saying, ‘Hold my beer and watch this!’ — Unknown

6. Being a nurse is weird. I can keep a poker face through trauma but have a mental breakdown over losing my favorite pen. — Unknown

7. Once a nurse, always a nurse. No matter where you go or what you do, you can never truly get out of nursing. It’s like the Mafia… you know too much. – Deb Gaudlin, RN

8. Yes, I am a nurse. No, I don’t want to look at it. — Unknown

9. Laughter is the best medicine… except when treating diarrhea. — Unknown

10. Not saying I’m a big deal, but the government classifies me as essential. — Unknown

11. How can anybody hate nurses? Nobody hates nurses. The only time you hate a nurse is when they’re giving you an enema. — Warren Beatty, Actor

12. Nurses can’t fix stupid… but we can sedate it. — Unknown

13. Nursing school is a lot like giving birth… Once it’s over, you tend to forget just how painful the process really was. — Unknown

14. I love being a nurse, but I mostly love wearing scrubs. They’re basically professional pajamas. — Unknown

15. It would not be possible to praise nurses too highly. — Stephen Ambrose, Author

16. Be nice to your nurse. They’re the person who chooses your catheter size. — Unknown

17. You can tell when a patient is feeling better when she starts to wear makeup. — Jenn O’Keefe

18. Every nurse has a best friend, Pam: LorazePAM, DiazePAM, and ClonazePAM. — Unknown

19. The nurse that can smile when things go wrong… is probably going off duty. — Unknown

20. I have restraints and Ativan, and I’m not afraid to use them. – Deborah Barnes, RN

Contact Sonas Home Health Care for Pediatric Nursing Jobs in Florida

Are you looking to become a pediatric nurse? Sonas Home Health Care can help. We are currently looking for compassionate and nurturing Pediatric Licensed Practical Nurses (LPNs) or Pediatric Registered Nurses (RNs) in various locations across Florida. Sonas specializes in one-on-one hourly pediatric care in the home. We offer on-the-job training, full benefits, flexible schedules, PTO, and more benefits.

If you or a loved one are considering a career in Pediatric Nursing in Florida, contact Sonas Home Health Care. Apply online or call today at (888) 592-5855.

Jillian Miller BSN, RN

Director of Nursing at Sonas Home Health Care

This blog was reviewed by Jillian Miller BSN, RN — Director of Nursing for Sonas Home Health Care’s Tampa Bay market — for clinical accuracy. Jillian Miller has been a nurse for 16 years — working primarily in pediatrics. She believes the best part of working with the pediatric population is when you see smiles from clients when you first enter the room. She loves seeing the difference you can make in families’ lives while providing the best care possible for them.